I’m just going to start off and say this month hasn’t been great. I had a few nice moments such as my mums birthday and a uni reunion in Leeds, but except for that I’ve felt really miserable all month for many reasons. You may have noticed I’ve been a bit more reserved on social media and just haven’t been feeling myself. I’ve kind of decided that May has been a write-off, hopefully June will be better all round!
Lost our little Billy
Whilst I was looking forward to May, my whole month ended up being tarred by losing our beautiful little cat Billy. Sadly on the 24th May we had to have him put down due to heart failure which was honestly so so hard. We’ve had Billy since I was around 8 years old so he was pushing for 15 and I keep having to remind myself that he lived a good long life and luckily didn’t have to suffer too much at the end, but it really doesn’t make it much easier. Losing a pet is horrible, it’s something I have experienced before but not for about ten years, and our house just feels empty without him as he was such a lovely (and clingy) cat. Pressing on as normal has been really hard, and whilst I did take a few days off from my blog, now that I’m back I’m still feeling demotivated and sad. I’m sure I’ll feel back to my normal self soon, but for now, it’s a bit raw.
Nights out and parties
This month I went on nights out twice, I mean wow, normally it’s like twice every six months. When I was younger I used to go out a lot, especially at uni but now that I’m more settled I tend to favour nights in eating pizza as opposed to Tiger Tiger. But this month was an exception, we had a little uni reunion up in Leeds which was as tragic as ever, then a few weekends later we went out again in London. It was really nice to see everyone, and I felt 18 all over again but it did make me realise I’m happier now that my life doesn’t revolve around nights out. My mum also had a big birthday party in May which was nice as I got to catch up with some of our extended family.
For the last few months, I’ve mentioned that I’ve felt a little uninspired by blogging and I couldn’t pinpoint why. I’ve liked some of my posts in May but everything has felt a little too formulaic. The other day I was browsing through my blog back in 2014 and I realised what I’ve been missing. I spend too much time now writing about themed things like “products for dewy skin” and trying to make collections out of things. I know people like to read about multiple products which is why I do it. But actually I miss my old posts where I’d just talk about my favourite lipstick at the time, it felt more authentic and spontaneous. So maybe expect a bit more 2014 The Makeup Directory from now on.
Every month I sit down here and come up with three tangible goals for the month ahead. I was planning on doing the same this time around, but actually, I’ve decided I’m going to give them a miss this month. I just feel like my only goal is to get back to my normal self and if I achieve that then I’ll be happy. I’m sure when it comes to July Goals I’ll be back as normal but for now, I just want to have a better month.
How has your May been and what are your goals for June?